I hate my birthday, always have and unfortunately I haven`t dealt on the subject with my psychiatrist .......yet.
My husband and sister had reserved Le Camp Notre-Dame de la Joie to celebrate it ( behind my back ) and had to cancel when I casually but firmly insisted on : No surprise birthday parties !
I like organizing them for others but don`t like having one myself.
Thing is, I don`t like surprises.
I like planned and organized stuff ( except for a nowhere roadtrip à la Jack Kérouac ).
Usally planned and organized by ME.
I know it`s the teacher part of me, but it`s also the insecure one.
I just don`t like surprises,good or bad.
Don`t lilke my birrthday so I don`t want 100 people under one roof reminding me that I`m getting older either.
My back and muscles remind me enough thank you.
However, I sincerely believe I`m getting YOUNGER and simply the age number I collect every July 30th plainly doesn`t match with how I feel.
Every year I do a BILAN, because that`s my thing : ASSESSMENT in English.
I like to do those, heck I do bilans of my bilans, it`s totally neurotic,I know.
I figure, if you wanna move forward, you gonna know where and what you`re coming from.
And that`s exactly what I`ve been doing lately, in my flowerbeds.
You should see my flowers, they are SPECTACULAR.
Alot of thought went into them let me tell ya.
It`s really the only place ( and while walking ) that I get to to alot of nonesense thinking and dreaming and of course, bilans.
They go together.
You could say my flowers are the fruits of all that thinking and at the end of the season I could show you which flowers helped me make decisions or had me thinking about subject X.
It`s literally my secret garden, nothing of that ever shows up here.
And by the looks of things in the flowerbeds, I`ve been doing ALOT of thinking.
99.9 % of it is all good.
And when a .1 % of regrets creeps up, literally bury it or take it out like the weeds.
Assessing, assessing, what does that do anyway.
Well for me, it has to have a purpose, an objective, a goal and especially : ACTION.
It`s not always good.
Example, I was thinking while Iwas weeding by the glasshouse: You know , you`re getting older, maybe it`s time you start ACTING YOUR AGE,NOT YOUR SHOE SIZE.
Tried it, didn`t enjoy it, didn`t last a week and started taking myself waaaaay too seriously.
Well I stopped that pretty quickly, let me tell ya.
Then I thought about my main motto in life .
It`s actually not mine, it`s Alexandre Jardin`s ( like in flowers......) an author, French author actually: From his novel Le Petit Sauvage , play the adult, but live and feel like a kid.
My favorite poet : Robert Frost wrote a poem called STAY GOLD about the subject which was picked up and included in my favorite author`s novel The Outsiders by S.E Hnton.
Coincidence, there`s no such thing.
So what are the actions coming about this year ?
SORRY GOTTA GO.
MY HUSBAND AND THE KIDS ARE THROWING ME OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR AN HOUR.
TIME FOR A QUICK JOG.
I`LL BE BACK LATER WITH FANTASTIC PICS AND THE REST.
ANNIE
PS: GROOVE IS IN THE HEART BABY !
I`m back.
Went for a jog, with my son trying to keep up.
Went for a ride in my Mustang and stopped at Mcd`S for a Ice coffee ( new addiction ) and came back.
Found out later my daughter made my cake with the help of daddy.
She did it so well, it was one of the best I`ve had.
Who would of though tone of my own kids would make MY birthday cake.
It`s usually th opposite.
Starting to lke the whole birthday idea all of a sudden.
Went over my sister`s house where we were received as kings for dinner.
My 2 godchildren were there, it was simply perfect.
My hubby tells me not to book my weekend.......hmmmmm, I hate the unknown.
Not that I don`t trust him.
Pierre got me the best gift ever : Jack kerouac`s On The Road and other novels and his poetry in ONE book.
It is HUGE.
On The Road changed my life at 16.
I`m doing my master`s around Jack Kerouac and his buddies and the Beat generation.
I love Jack Kerouac period.
I have to tell you all about him in a future blog, you won`t be able to resist this man.
And he was soooo darn cute.
Read the novel,then thank me.
Allright, let`s go back to the subject I was developping when I was kicked out of the house.
What are the actions I will take this year ?
This year is the FIRST year of the rest of my life.
Ths is the stepping stone year for me.
My future lies in this year.
I`m going back to school.
After years of encouragement from family and friends, I`m going not only for the Master`s but visualizing the Doctor`s degree in the future.
I`ve been researching on my Master`s subject for a year now and decided to plunge.
Everyone around me was convinced it was time to do it except me.
I have done so much research on my Master`s Memoir that I am at the moment not sure if I will do it in English Literature or in Anthropology.
Both look good at the moment.
I`m officially starting in January.
Just getting in the Master`s program is no small task.
I met the head of the Master in Education program ( very nice French woman ) and it clicked right away.
She showed me around the department and told her I was very familiar with it having done 2 B.A`s in education already. God, that just sounded very snobby now doesn`t it.
She congratulated me on my joining the program to which I answered : you haven`t even received my application form yet.
She smiled and shook my hand as I was leaving.
I`m in, it`s just not official yet.
So I will be busy from September to December.
Once I`m oficially in, I will celebrate.
New English material in Sec.2
New challenges, new stuff.
Can`t wait.
I need new challenges YESTERDAY.
I was getting bored and that is not good.
I am also preparing my future teaching career.
I`m aiming College and university level in the future.
That`s right folks, I will not retire at Jean Nicolet.
My goal is to start teaching college or university before I can teach my own kids at Jean Nicolet.
Félix-Antoine will be in Sec.2 in 5 years.
I will be out of there before if things work out like I want.
Don`t get me wrong, I loooove teaching at Jean Nicolet, I just don`t see myself doing it till I retire.
I need new challenges.
It`s time.
And who says teaching university can NOT be fun and just be serious.
Pierre`s aunt has been teaching university for 20 years now and loves it.
She was and still is a model for me.
20 years ago I wanted to be like her: career first, teach university, write bookos, no kids etc.
Somehow, my goals have changed over the years but some I still hunger for.
Besides, I went to the eye doctor last week.
Another sign I`m getting old, I need reading glasses.
I call them Professor glasses.
I figure, if I`m going to have the glasses, I might as well do the rest.
If you`re going to look the part, act the part as the old saying goes.
I`m going to look so smart with those reading glasses, I can`t wait to get them.
What is a Duff ?
A Duff is the beer on the Simpson`s right?
Homer`s beer.
Well not here.
I`m talking about a wonderful family here.
Our buddies of 15 years.
Like us : a momma bear, a poppa bear and their 2 baby bears.
Have been married for 18 years ( Duff, correct me if I`m wrong ) are are still very much in love with each other.
They are sweet, funny, the greatest, the simplest, the smartest and most caring people I know .
I love them.
There`s only one problem with the Duff family : they are thousands of miles away since December.
They are in New Cadelonia ( near New Zealand ) and a plane ticket is one the most expensive one on the market.
The Duff family is very missed by Pierre, myself and my kids.
You`d know them, you`d miss them too.
I think of them a lot while playing in the flowerbed.
They are there for 5 years !
It hasn`t been a year yet and it seems like forever.
So if I could have one wish granted today, I wish there were here.
If you want to see who these great people are and see them in their new environment here`s Duff`s blog :
http://alaindufresne-duff.blogspot.com/
I started blogging thanks to Duff.
If you`re wondering who is the sexy woman in the red bikini, that`s SoSo ( Sonia ) , his wife and my gal pal.
This family is our model and we totally look up to them.
I have never laughed so much as when I am with them.
No one has made me laugh as Duff has- No one.
I have never felt so much love among 4 people as them.
So , to the Duff family : SoSo, Duff, JuJu, Sam : 4 years and 1/2 to go.......
I promised pictures ( trust me they are friggin` fantastic )but I`ll have to post them later.
It`s really late and I need my Jack Kerouac dose before I go to sleep.
Groove is in the heart,
Annie
A day at the lake with my pal Lyne from Gatineau.Kat had brought a HUGE bag of jujubes ( another addiction ) and every time she`s hand them over she`d say : " here, don`t forget your daily fruit portion " Spoken like a true mom ! We`d eat those befrore breakfast. That` s what happens when there is no adult supervision.
Isn`t that on my my medical insurance card ? Postcard from the edge.
When we arrived at the gate Friday afternoon, here`s what was there: a Jeep with really great wheels. Had to have a pic to show Pierre our future wheels on the truck. Love at first sight !
Ok, so I don`t have a great Jeep with fat tires but I have 3 wonderful friends with me. That explains the big smile on my face and the fact that Kat is about to hand over the big bag of jujubes again.....
The view awaiting us..... And they say camping is roughing it. I like it rough baby !!!!!
Early Saturday morning ......waiting for the coffee. Best coffee in the world.
Friday night, Tonton Sébas`ribs on the grill. Best, no BEST ribs in the world. I ate so much I needed a crane to get away from the table.
Actual view from the table while we were eating. The bucket was NOT the W.C`s......
This was the official photo to put on the milk carton if ever we decided not to return home.
It was also a photo for Tonton Sébas for preparing us the best ribs on a certain 40 degree evening back in Gatineau.
I now call Tonton Sébas : Tonton SéBest.
I swear I have Katherine`s blessing to post this pic.
This is Kat, ready to use the W.c`s in back of the camp.
We thought her system to be quite hilarious until we tried it.
Works wonders.
Well that`s all for now folks.
And now, you know why the groove IS in this heart.
Tata darling,
Annie xx